Google+ Positive Psychologist: Anger

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Showing posts with label Anger. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Anger. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

"Good" Morning!


I love reading www.stanleyonbible.com and this is a beautiful post I couldn't ignore.

Everyday we pass through so many situations where we are lured to show our nasty side (trust me it is there in both you and me) and it hurts both the sender and receiver. Stanley spells out a solution from the Bible.


God does not ignore what we speak when we are agitated with anger and agonizing in anguish. Rather He takes a serious view of it. The Book of Job vividly illustrates this point. What God said at the end of the story is a sober truth. He told Eliphaz, "I am angry with you and with your two friends, for you have not been right in what you SAID about Me, as My servant was" (Job 42:7).

What lies beyond death and grave is the greatest strengthener of our feeble hands and weak knees. We have every reason to be agitated and lose patience in suffering if there is no life after death. How many long hours we sometimes wait in visa issuing offices to travel overseas! How much we rejoice when the visa is finally stamped on our passports! How much more patient should we be today for the glory land we would enter tomorrow! "What we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory God will give us later" (Rom 8:18).

When we lose patience in any situation, virtues leave us one by one, and vices lift up their ugly heads. We suddenly realize that we have spoken detestable words which are too many to be taken back. If we are quiet and confident, we can declare, "God knows the way I take; when He has tried me, I shall come forth as gold" (Job 23:10).

Think of the words of impatience poured out of our mouths while suffering in the past. If God had reciprocated our anger and impatience, would He have delivered us from our problems? Waves are nothing to those who regularly bathe in the sea. Likewise let us get accustomed to live with sufferings. See what Paul has written in Romans 5:3-5: "We can rejoice when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they are good for us—they help us to learn patience. And patience develops strength of character in us, and character strengthens our confident expectation of salvation. And this expectation will not disappoint us!"

The disease of Job was awful. He was dying daily without dying. But he knew that there was light after the tunnel, and life after death. This confidence gave birth to this song: "I know that my Redeemer lives... And after my skin is destroyed, this I know, that in my flesh I shall see God!" (Job 19:25,26). This cannot be anything but the prophetic expectation of the glorified bodies which will be given to the children of God in the New Heaven and New Earth! Cheer up, dear Christian, your night will soon be over and there will be Dayspring!


Thursday, May 2, 2013

Don't ask me what you know already

Often I have been asked by people the same things. Again and again. Usually this is when you are in the nick of closing something. I try and control my agitated mind which is perplexed as I would have shared the same data, excel file or numbers time and again. Can you send me again is the next question! I am short of an expression here. Why would I send you the same thing again? I would share it hadn't I given you that last week/month and sometimes in the last hour.

What is my takeaway from this? Well, here it goes...

Either you are too dull or slow or lazy to keep asking for the same thing again and again or you are too smart and keep asking things to show that because you didn't have that and didn't have this you are allowed to delay the delivery.

I have on solution for this. Create or move on.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Objection?

Some times people object, interrupt, raise questions, disturb for the heck of asking. Just for the heck of asking. Usually this is because they want to prove that they are there, they exist! To prove their importance when they feel bad, neglected or just out of place. If you are one of those people, you are only gaining temporary attention and disgust and hatred. Its all about controlling your emotions and shutting up when you are not interested.

Monday, October 6, 2008

What's your problem?

Some people have a problem with everything and keep yelling all the time. The slightest chance and they explode. Spoiling every one's day around them. We had one such experience today. One simple act of forgiveness should have sufficed the whole situation but the person wouldn't agree! Though he shared 50% of the error his attitude was like: Its your mistake!

What's your problem?

The solution to this is simple:
  • Stay happy with yourself (If you don't like yourself, no one else will)
  • Stay happy about your work (If you don't like what you do, walk out! No one is forcing you to do things you don't like. If you can't, better shut up and accept what you are doing is good)
  • Exercise for 30 mts everyday (I need to try this one)
  • Sing a song that makes you happy every morning before coming to work
  • Try stress management techniques (Sing a song, count to ten, forgive, walk out, shut up! --- If you have something else that works tell me)
  • Decide you will not get angry today no matter what
  • People at the receiving end are REAL PEOPLE, so think before you speak and act
  • Plan to make people around you happy
  • Have a work-life balance
  • Plan your day
Now what do we do if we are at the receiving end?
  • Stay calm (Shouting at them will not solve the problem)
  • It's a REAL person, so give them some time to cool down
  • Apologize! (Yes, even if you are not in the wrong, it works)
  • Walk away and come back
  • Show respect and concern
  • Use escalation matrix (It is there for a reason)
You might like my similar posts here: Kick the Dead and Kick the rule book.

Pic: FFO

Adapt