The importance of being humble

Are you humble enough? They say you can't teach humility overnight. It is true. It is something you imbibe in you over a long period of time. 

I remember what one of my very educated professors at Nizam college said about research. When I asked him what lies beyond his post doctoral research, he replied that he now knows that there is so much more to learn and that he had just wet his feet in the waves of the ocean. I understand that now. After reading so much we know that there is so much more that humans have written down, documented, catalogued in the last few thousand years and we don't even unwrap the gift box yet. May be we just know a minuscule amount of things as a humanity yet.

When you are growing up in life, in knowledge, in career, learn to grow with wisdom too. As we grow we need to remember to cultivate the ultimate knowledge that the best among us are just a speck of dust on the scales of time. Jawaharlal Nehru described Napoleon was a comma in the history of mankind. Just a comma. Not even a full stop. It meant that the history of mankind pauses to observe the greatness, the passion and the great heights this puny French man achieved and yet moved on. When I had a chance to see the life-size bust of Napoleon in the famous Salarjung museum in Hyderabad, I was blown not see the face of a man, who made history pause, actually had a face smaller than mine!

As we grow, expand, learn, increase in power, never forget the less-privileged, helpless, lost souls, I implore you to remember to be humble. to be kind, to be gracious and act sensibly. Behave like you would want the other person to behave if your roles are switched. Empathise and have gratitude. If you do that you will be an angel with wings and will be blessed. Be humble despite what is the fashion as of today. Be humble as if you don't bother. Like Socrates. Like Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam. Like Ratan Tata. Like Mother Teresa. Like Mahatma Gandhi. Like Jesus. Be what your soul with wings of an angel would behave like. Be what your child, father, mother would be proud of. Or else your millions won't matter, your awards, your achievements, your influence, your life, your name - won't just matter and will disappear.

But if you choose to be humble, things change. Because it is easy to be humble, you would actually matter more. You wouldn't have to pretend, if you grow to be a humble person. Your work would talk more. Your actions would stand out. You would grow as a person, gain respect, influence others, change lives, deliver blessings. You would be the real deal, the real hustle and the real angel. Can we all try and do that? Can we make being humble fashionable again? I hope you do! Share a story with me about anyone you have seen be humble.

Hey Dad, be a MOM

In my travels overseas, I am sometimes pleasantly surprised when I see things like this. This was a baby changing station in the mens washroom in Singapore. I was super happy to see it. Always, we see mom as a caregiver and we plan things like these in womens washrooms. Never have I seen a dad take a child comfortably to the men's room (many reasons why). 

As a parent, I always believed being available for every important thing and every point possible for your children. Be it the scans when we were expecting or an injection or a doctor visit. I was there when my little ones were born, literally. This is a bit strange in India but yes, thanks to good doctors, our convincing skills and thanks to my beautiful wife. 

When you are in a situation where you can help, do it. Be there more than you can. Be a parent who is always there. Be a caring, loving, available on demand parent. Be available to appreciate the soap bubble, a fleeting butterfly, the beautiful art on the rented house wall, the pen art on your clothes. Be there to blow over that bruise, touch up the make up, wipe away those little tears, give that hug. Hug more often, reassure and be there to show you care. 

If there is anything that we are lacking in our children, that would be empathy, caring, being kind and being an emotionally healthy human being. Make sure you teach your children that you are there for the right things and you don't let the wrong things happen. Be there and lead by example. In other words, there is no more gender role rigidity. Change that and every day can and must be a mom and every mom can and must be a dad. Be a role model.

If you have examples of dads who are awesome or moms who remind you of being a caring, kind parent, tag them here and thank them. Have a great day.

Being Kind

One of the things that is going extinct is the art of being kind. We are less kinder than our parents and they were less kinder than theirs. I don't expect this to change due to several reasons. Technology has helped us to successfully mask ourselves from the everyday so called mundane emotions and push to remain normal, well behaved droids who just go about their business and seek efficiency. 

Being kind is not an option. It is a compulsion. With the amount of things going around us, all of us are under tremendous pressure to perform, to out run, to over achieve, to be ahead, we tend to fall into the conundrum of expectations and become ruthless soulless beings that dwell on incessant things to fulfill our insatiable desires. In such a situation the only thing that can re-humanize us would be to have the simple joy of sharing things and being merciful and kind. 

While I would like to say be forgiving, it need not always be forgiving. You can be kind to a pet, to a stranger, to a child, to your bus driver, to your local vegetable vendor, to the guy who opens the door for you and to the guy who serves your coffee. A simple smile, a kind gesture or a heartfelt thank you would make the day for many and we have nothing to lose but gain a lot when we do that. Not many are blessed like you and me and have to face tough situations all through their day!

Teach yourself to be a kinder human being, your children to grow up as individuals who are kind and be an example to others by being nice. What about yourself? Be kind to yourself too. When you miss a deadline, fail to match up to your high set pedestal or performance, it is okay to fail once in a while, just forgive yourself and move on to try again. 

Inculcate a culture of being kind, nice and pleasant and your day will change. We all need a bit of kindness everyday. Don't we?

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H is for How happy you are!

Happiness is relative. Happiness is what you need to measure according to yourself. Happiness is not determined by what we have what we don't or what we can do and what we cannot. Happiness should never depend on an external factor. While it is very easy to give gyan, this is a realistic statement. Happiness is a state of the mind and is what matters most to you. 

We all experience moments of happiness all through like a win in a match, scoring good marks in an exam, going on a vacation, eating what we like but these are just fleeting moments that we encounter everyday. What determines how happy you are is a combination of all these things and few more important characteristics. 

Have you ever tried being thankful for what you have? Try being kind. Giveaway something you love to someone who needs it more thank you. Connect to someone who had wronged you and forgive them for no reason. Be normal and get the friend back. Help someone in need without expecting anything in return. You know where I am going with this.

Whenever I go to have breakfast outside I see lot of people waiting for people to give alms as they walk out. Some of them might be actors who don't need money at all but most of them are people who are genuinely hungry. I always used to buy them food but not I see lot of people doing that too! I am very happy that this trend is catching on. You won't mind leaving a 10%+ tip in your hotel bill but hesitate to give some 20 rupees to this guy to have breakfast. When you share your meal, isn't it sharing happiness? I came across this wonderful post about being grateful and thankful. 

While you should never let an external event change how you feel, always have control on creating happiness for yourself and people around you and then no one would question how happy you are! Because if there is one thing money cannot buy, that is happiness. 

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