Zip the excuse

Why do we tend to move closer to excuses and find them at every corner and nook? If you need to improve yourself, which all of us need to do, we need to stop finding excuses and do more. Act more, learn more. How can I you may ask. Where can I do? Well this article is about you. 

In the olden days, and in some cases almost a decade ago, education and training was limited to the select few who could afford classes, material and time to go through the process. It was very expensive, time consuming and stressful. Not anymore. Now you have an ocean of knowledge just available on your smart phone and you would be an idiot if you ignore the potential. Don't use your phone to just play games and read jokes on whatsapp. Read good books, search online and train yourself to be better at what you like and what you do. Don't give yourself the reason that you don't have time too. If you can spend 1 hour on facebook, whatsapp, you can definitely spend fifteen minutes a day to learn something new. Do that.

When knowledge is freely available, it is a great equalizer. You need to unleash that potential and use it to your advantage to surge ahead. If you have been given a full paid ticket to learn at Harvard or any other best university in the world, would you just sleep rather spend time reading jokes and unnecessary forwards? The technology has enabled us to do that. Let us push ourselves and learn something new every month. 

When the race needs you to move faster and upgrade, instead of stressing more upgrade your skills. This is a race of death and defeat. So either upgrade or get obsolete. You have no option.

#PositivePsychologist
#atozchallenge
#Ziptheexcuse

Yearn for success

Want success like nothing else. Yearn for it and learn to earn it! The most important thing is wanting success is whether you want it for yourself or for others. If you want to win something for others you might lose interest in between but if you want to win for yourself then there is nothing that can stop you. 

The secret here is to keep yourself going regardless of what the situations are and what people around you tell you. There may be chances of failure but if you keep pushing yourself to do better. When naysayers and situations tell you to stop and be bogged down, tell them to stop irritating you and take a hike. Tell your excuses to take a hike. Tell your problems, issues, fears, distractions to take a hike. Then you take a hike and perform. Because if you don't yearn enough, you will never give enough.

#AtoZChallenge
#ConsumerPsyche
#Yearnenough
 

Don't be a Xerox copy

The brand name has become a common phenomenon to use the name Xerox for a copier and today I want to talk to you about being a rubber stamp. Don't be one. What makes you different from others is your individuality and your touch to the work. If you are just recreating from your previous work today, then it is of no use. You are just repeating everything and it is not going to add anything to you.

At work everyday, try and make small advances to your work and change your work style to match to something new today. Learn something new today and use that to reflect in your work. A new word, a new line, a new idea or anything that you can. 

It is frightening to start something new and think of being acceptable but do give a try. Think of what you can change in your routine, like food, coffee, spices, drink, music, loo, something... change and see how it can make your day different. Life is too short to stick to boring choices. Make a different one today! Make your own choice.

People would recognize you for what you do differently and that would be a part of your character. If you lose that then there is nothing for anyone to remember you about. As parents we should encourage children to have their own individuality and as leaders we must encourage our team to have their own flair and get to the goal. Have that flair for yourself, show me your character.

#PositivePsychologist

#ConsumerPsyche
#BeDifferent
#AtoZChallenge

Winning is a habit

Make winning a habit, whether it is big or small a win is a win and it matters a lot to boost your confidence and the zeal to push forward. Actually winning is a strategic step you need to take. Have a goal, plan the steps to reach the goal, work towards them eagerly and don't give up. Constantly evaluate the steps and see if you need to improve on them. Be mindful of the competition and see how you can beat them. As long as you are performing better than the last time you tried is a win in itself. 

When you are looking to win and are doing it regularly it is a good sign. What if there is no competition? Well you can have one - yourself. Take walking for example, plan and walk a bit more and in better time when you can and if you exceed from yesterday, it is a win.

When you are obsessively passionate about your work and are changing the world on bit at a time everyday, then you are a winner. Find a work that does exactly this and be fanatic about it. Unless you are deeply passionate about going to work today, then you need to keep looking and find what do you like to do. Like Steve Jobs said, winning is a good habit and you need to keep it all the time. Trust me once you win, you will cherish that feeling so much that you want it again. Having a passion to come out on top would motivate you to the ends of this world and beyond. 

#PositivePsychologist
#ConsumerPsyche
#WinningisaHabit
#AtoZChallenge

Up you go

When things don't go your way and you are pushed to the lowest point in life, be happy and celebrate for anything that can happen from now on can only mean one thing - it is going to be better!

Last couple of weeks I have been blogging about positive psychology and today this topic would definitely cheer you up. I believe God does not give you more temptations that you can handle and when you are being tested, believe that you are made tough to handle that and hence the test. You don't test a car at a certain speed unless you know it can handle. Similarly God doesn't test you against situations where you can come out a victor. There is a solution to this madness and God wants to you to handle.

Remember the analogy of the rubber ball. What happens when you hit the ball hard on a wall? It bounces back with the same speed that you hit it with. What happens when you leave the ball on the floor? It stays there depending on the gravity pull. The harder you hit, the harder you bounce back and that is the secret to success in life. When you face a failure, take a detour and walk as if nothing happened, with the same gait, bounce and joy in your step. If any, you have become wiser.

Learning to pick yourself up when pushed down is the ultimate key to survival. And don't we all love a winner? So when you are down look up and push yourself up.

#PositivePsychologist
#ConsumerPsyche
#Pickyourselfup
#AtoZChallenge#WorkBlues

Team Maker

Mahendra Singh Dhoni is a captain who has seen many victories in his life as a cricketer. His captaincy style is lauded and he is one of the best captains Indian cricket has ever seen. Nadal and Federer are probably two of the best tennis players the world has ever seen and have won numerous matches and titles. Saina Newal is one of the best badminton players in the world. All these people have something in common regardless of the sport. Though they come out as winners and are seen on the podium, they cannot reach there without a massive team effort behind them. Teams of people who take care of them right from training to food to studying the competition to helping them to move on and surge from defeat to victory. The best of the best are because of their teams and it is always a joy to work in teams.

Today's tip would be to work with an awesome team both in life and work. At home make a team with your partner, kids, parents, family and ensure they all know what their roles are and make sure each of them fulfill that to the best of their abilities. The roles can be insignificant to your goal but still they may have to function a particular way to let you win. A team that works together wins together. No role is anything less than what it should be and none of the contributions can be ignored.

Same applies to work where your office boy who gives you water and coffee needs to function efficiently to ensure all the staff goes on their work in an efficient manner. Same applies to your driver, lift operator and many others who help the day go on. Most of these jobs get minimal appreciation and thankless comments are galore. We need to understand that unless these people are at their best, the damage is immense and hence it is important to have them work efficiently every day.

Build a team of people who enjoy their work around you. Be thankful, respectful and appreciate their contribution to the main cause. I have seen worst of the people come out with grace with a little appreciation where money and force couldn't. Train if required and make each one of your team understand their purpose of work. Be a team maker and when your team is shining, you will too.

#PositivePsychologist
#ConsumerPsyche
#TeamMaker
#AtoZChallenge

#WorkBlues

Simplicity

Simplicity is a virtue not many possess and not many can handle. The quicker you get to learn to handle that you would be a winner. Simplicity in what you may ask, so here I go! In everything we do in our lives from things we need, buy, use, how we celebrate, communicate, appreciate, criticize and assume. Look at some of the best world leaders in thought and culture, they have been at their best when they were simple.

Let us start with what we expect from our family. When you get served food, love and affection, learn to appreciate the time taken by the other person in getting things done despite having their own problems and the effort put into bringing things together. Don't fuss about presentation, taste, color, warmth of the food and so on but appreciate that it is there. A small compliment would go a long way in boosting the confidence and appreciation is like wild fire, catches things that are dormant for ages and lights them up. If you really need a presentation try working in the kitchen for a day catering to the family or find a high class restaurant. 

At work, do not be fussy about the way things go about. Being simplistic in your choices. The simpler your choices are the easier it would be to handle the situation. Let me give you another example. Steve Jobs is well known all over for his creativity, innovation in design and business acumen. He could do things that no one else could do in terms of creating trends that world would wake up to. In his personal life he chose a principle of simplicity, which many often ascribe to his visit to India and the principles of Buddhism, Jainism and ancient Hindu Sattvic life values, he kept his choices simple. He always wore a black turtle-neck tee shirt and jeans as he thought these mundane things like dressing up every day would be of no use when you need to focus on more important things about life, work and so on. This principle in life is also seen in the design of the iphone and ipad which had only one button on the top. In the world of mobiles having multiple buttons, this was a revolutionary innovation but it makes your life simple and clean. The same dressing style is taken up by Mark Zuckerberg of Facebook who shows up with a ash round neck tee and jeans unless he is in a suit.

Have simple choices and in life. People around you would fuss for a while, then give up and then ignore and then choose to respect your choices. About ten years ago I started wearing a black tee shirt and jeans to work and kept at it. I get a lot of time to think, use my time in a much better way. Try it out and I am sure you would like it. Have a simply awesome life.

#PositivePsychologist
#ConsumerPsyche
#KeepitSimple
#AtoZChallenge

#WorkBlues

Run Run Run

Yes run run and run. You got to keep running. Imagine life is a race and the winner gets a lot of things but the loser in the race is dead and forgotten. Dead I am okay but forgotten I am not and I don't want to be one of those people who came here, lived here and went on his way with no memories, laurels and positivism left behind. Today we are talking about positive psychology and self help tips and the basis of survival.

Whenever I want to get charged up and learn something about survival, I turn to mother nature to show us examples. In a herd of deer when being chased by the tiger, the deer have to outrun others but also keep running till it is safe. That is for today and tomorrow the tiger might return and the game is always like that. Keep surviving, be the fastest in the group and do it again tomorrow. 

How do we do that? Keep your energy levels so high that you can keep running, learning, winning and not giving up or slacking? Look at these small creatures who keep themselves busy all the time. Ants! Ants have an amazing sense of purpose. Take whatever they want to do, they will be persistent and keep doing it even if it means losing their life over it. Have you ever seen an ant sleeping, lazying or relaxing? Never. If it is not moving, it means it is dead. Isn't life like that? For every opportunity, we let go, for every chance we stop taking up, there will be hundred people willing to take that up and surge ahead. Learn to keep yourself motivated, learn the art of continuity. Realise the importance of being on the run. Got to keep running.

When you have continuity in whatever you are doing, you will be alive. You can have a dream, goal, target you want to achieve and that would drive you till you reach there. Similarly when you have the zeal in your to perform, to stay ahead, you always win. Regardless of what position in the race you are, if you are ahead of where you want to be, then you are winning. Have no one to beat but you. Bring the best out of yourself today. Come back tomorrow and do it again. Run, win, run, win, repeat.

#PositivePsychologist
#ConsumerPsyche
#Keeprunning
#AtoZChallenge

#WorkBlues

Quest on

The pundits would have giggled when they formed the word Question. As we are talking about self help tips and positive psychology to succeed at workplace this month, let us talk about learning through questioning.

As kids we all are open to ask question. Remember your school days? But as we grow up we shy away. Each day when you go about your work question yourself how do we do this better? Is this the best way to go about this work problem or can I find a more interesting way, more easier way or more fun way to do this. Then try and do it some other way and see how it works out. If there is an easier way you should find out, find it out!

When you come across any word you cant decipher, check it out. Find out the meaning right then and there. You need some tools on your phone, ipad or on computer to set that thing on. Learn how to write better, speak better. Keep learning.

One thing I am addicted to is reading. Reading can open up your mind and change your perspectives, help generate new ideas, give solutions to problems, create new ones :) Basically help you in changing the stautus quo. Pick books that matter to you and talk about things you are interested in. Read life histories, read leadership, management books (time, life, people, love and so on). Pick up fiction, poetry, music whatever motivates you and keeps you going. Pick anything you want but keep the quest on.

At work learn new things you can do, learn what your colleagues do, superiors do, what you can do to go to the next level and perform better. Question the status quo and see that you understand, change, lead and motivate yourself and others to perform better.

At home ask questions to your wife about her day. She would have have an exciting day too. Check that out. Lend a genuine ear and empathise with her work and life and celebrate her success more than you celebrate yours. If she wins, you have already won. Question your kids about their day at school/college/work and encourage their victories, make it a big deal, lend an ear to their troubles, problems and see how they can work it out. Question your parents about their day, issues and what not. Seek the kid in you to be alive with the curiosity quotient at the peak and keep learning for the day you stop learning and questioning is the day you cease to live and just exist. Don't be a zombie, be alive - Question.

#PositivePsychologist
#ConsumerPsyche
#Question
#AtoZChallenge
#MondayBlues

Passion is the key

What is life without a passion? What is the use of owing the best car without the fuel? Passion is vital to any success. When you see Usain Bolt breeze through the 100 metre track like a lightening, what we see is that Usain makes it look easy. What we don't see is the pain and the struggle that goes behind the training and thousands of hours to make that happen.

Every moment when you are building up to something, creating something you are forced to think to quit, to give it up and move on to easier tasks and find out the less painful way to success. Unless you have the passion to follow it up. Unless you have the passion to push you further, to unleash the demons in you, to fuel you, to let you run the longest with the last drop of energy in your body. Passion is the key for success. Passion drives you, drains you, encourages you, kills you but passion makes you win and makes you a hero.

Have a passion in your life, find what you love and make it your life's purpose to be the best in what you love. Learn what you need to, acquire the skillset required to do that, train like hell, train like there is no tomorrow. Learn, learn, learn and then learn again. You cannot should not must not and will not give up. Because giving up is not an option. Giving up is for duffers. Giving up is for losers. For when you give up, you already lose. You let yourself down. Don't push yourself back. Push ahead. Push harder. Push yourself. You need to do this and move ahead. Surge ahead. Win this. Close this. Seal this with a victory and your name written on it. That is possible with passion. Guess what, if you are passionate enough you can win this and make it look easy when you do that.

Check out this video of Usain Bolt training. How many times he throws up, tires down and looks to quit but he doesn't. He pushes on to be faster. His passion drives him.

Never give up! Cheers to passion.

#PositivePsychologist
#ConsumerPsyche
#PassionistheKey
#AtoZChallenge
#MondayBlues

Opportunities - don't let them go

She is said to knock only once. Will knock twice if you are very lucky. Not many are but that is how she rolls. What do we do when we meet a great opportunity? We usually hesitate if we can take it right now or think if we can do a good job with this and so on. I want to encourage you today to take up every opportunity that comes across in your life and give it your best shot. Often opportunities come in disguised as problems, roadblocks or rejections. When we face these, we tend to lose hope on what we are doing and think this is a dead end of the road for us and turn back. Instead if we look at this as an opportunity and see how to overcome the problem, find a solution and surge ahead with double speed, we would be encashing a large bank of possibilities.

Let me give you an example. Take Elon Musk, one of the most admired entrepreneurs. He made a lot of money in Paypal, probably the biggest inventions of his time and used that money to invest in a couple of ideas he believed in. Unlike many others who use the money to live a lavish lifestyle, he chose to live a normal life while working with the ideas of future. Last week he launched the Model 3 of Tesla car which would probably go on to be one of the best Hybrid cars of all time and be a game changer. Elon is a leader who saw the problem and decided to tackle it head on as he made it an opportunity to grab. 

Take Bill Gates for example. When he was in business end of Microsoft, he was bullish, very competitive and used all his time and energy to build an empire where Office meant Microsoft. Now that he has retired, he joined his wife Melinda in their Melinda Gates foundation and is hell bent on doing charity work and rehabilitation programs all over the world. He could have donated to some charity and relaxed his retired life but despite being the richest man on the planet, he chose to be involved in a cause he believes is an opportunity to serve.

We all face problems on a daily basis, rejections often and failures too but if we look up to them and tell them that they cannot intimidate you despite being real and that you will not give up, there will be a door somewhere for you, open and ready to start off. Today I encourage you to take up a stand and challenge yourself that next time you see a problem you will smile and find a solution. Next time you see a challenge you will roll up your sleeves and win it. Next time you fail, you will pick yourself up, dust off and take a detour. Live gives you an opportunity to win, make sure you win it.

#PositivePsychologist
#ConsumerPsyche
#Failureisanopportunity
#AtoZChallenge
#MondayBlues

Negative attitude

This is a part of a series of articles I am writing for the self help techniques and positive psychology and here we are today with the topic of negative attitude. 

If there is one thing we can all do without is this quality - Negative attitude. Trust me when I say it can kill! Let me give you an example - a negative Shaguni could kill a 100 strong princes and a positive Krishna could lead five brothers to victory and beyond. A negative minded Bhijjala Deva in Bahubhali could lead a prosperous kingdom to doom and unhappiness to all. Hitler based his campaign on negativity to jews and other people and ended in destruction to others and himself. A positive Tippu Sultan dies defending a Hindu Temple and is worshiped as a legend even today. 

What do we do to avoid negative attitude and people. People you should avoid. Negative attitude is like cancer and creeps slowly into your brain and makes itself comfortable there spreading silently binging off the positive cells and thoughts. Self doubt is one such thing we need to avoid at any cost. Negative people and thoughts always come off as very decent, realistic, positive good meaning but never are so. Whenever you want to achieve something, plan something or start there would be someone who would caution you, listen to them and many more but take your own decision. There is no need to stop because there are risks, take calculative risks and listen to naysayers but use that to strengthen your resolve and take precautions. 

Never forget training, preparing, planning before execution of the idea or task. When given a task to cut a tree in eight hours, a smart guy would sharpen his axe for the first 7 hours and cut the tree in the next one hour. Plan, prepare and go on to execute. If you fail in the attempt, don't let people or failure pull you down, try again.

#PositivePsychology
#ConsumerPsyche
#NegativeAttitude
#AtoZChallenge

Measuring metrics

We are talking about the self help tips and positive psychology techniques to improve. One of the easiest ways to slip is when we do not measure our performance. When we have nothing to compare how do we even try to improve. Have a measuring method to see how you have performed yesterday and compare it with today. 

All great performers, athletes, managers... all of them push themselves harder to perform better than yesterday and ensure they have the right tools to help them to do so. Measure your time spent on mail, chatting, social media, making reports, tasks that you have to do, talking on phone and all other mundane tasks like coffee breaks and so on. Do it for a week and see how much time you can save when you were focused and how much time was lost in non productive things. Once you know the number, try to get more on the focused side this week and repeat next week till you know you are good enough and have productive time on your side.

Usain bolt, Roger Frederer, Saching Tendulkar and all the other winners have something in common. They measure their work everyday. Work on their techniques, strategy, performance every day and train everyday. They have professional teams to look up their numbers, crunch them for trends, ensure they are ahead. When you see these leaders and masters of their game, it is these hours and hours of training and hard work they put in that pays. This is possible only when you measure constantly and improve on that.

When you do this regularly you tend to me more satisfied with yourself as you can see continuous improvement, feel less tired and learn to prioritize your tasks easily. What is the point of going to work everyday if you do the same things again and again and end up with a boring schedule? Time to change that. Make improvements, implement measuring metrics, change your daily schedule to better than yesterday and make your today get you more.

#AtoZChallenge

#PositivePsychologist

#ConsumerPsyche
#MeasuringMetrics

Love what you do

Love what you do. You might have heard this before. What is new in this post then?

Do what you love is what most of us believe in and try to do but not everyone has the opportunity to do what they love for a living. There is a very high probability that you might be stuck in a job or profile doing what you may not be necessarily liking or in some cases hating what you do. In such situations your performance and happiness levels are at the southern most point. How can you change it and push your ratings north? Here are some tips.

1. Appreciate what you have for a job and understand its importance in your financial, family, social status. Be thankful for what you have.
   
2. Be the best you can be. Do not give a half hearted attempt at what you are doing but give your full attention to the work. Spend time to learn how to do it better, seek advice from seniors, learn the art of perfecting it over time and see how much fun you can have at the same boring stuff. You never know.
   
3. Remember the work you do, regardless of where you are working involves a product or service that would go out and eventually effect the people at some point. Remember that your contribution is very important for them to be able to use this product/service. Try and add more value to that.
   
4. Make a good team of people friends at work who wouldn't bother about complaining but contribute positively to your psyche.
   
5. Get involved in a cause or support one from your savings. Doesn't matter how small, it would go a long way in bringing in manifold happiness.
   
6. Aspire to do better, learn how to climb up the ladder at work by being efficient, learning the art and managerial skills.
   
7. Have a personal cave for relaxation - like running, walking, gardening, spending time reading, with children, pets and what not. Have your cave. 

Loving what you do is an art you got to learn quick so you can make your days brighter and better. Once you love what you do, nothing else matters.

#AtoZChallenge
#ConsumerPsyche
#PositivePsychologist
#LoveWhatYouDo

Being Kind

One of the things that is going extinct is the art of being kind. We are less kinder than our parents and they were less kinder than theirs. I don't expect this to change due to several reasons. Technology has helped us to successfully mask ourselves from the everyday so called mundane emotions and push to remain normal, well behaved droids who just go about their business and seek efficiency. 

Being kind is not an option. It is a compulsion. With the amount of things going around us, all of us are under tremendous pressure to perform, to out run, to over achieve, to be ahead, we tend to fall into the conundrum of expectations and become ruthless soulless beings that dwell on incessant things to fulfill our insatiable desires. In such a situation the only thing that can re-humanize us would be to have the simple joy of sharing things and being merciful and kind. 

While I would like to say be forgiving, it need not always be forgiving. You can be kind to a pet, to a stranger, to a child, to your bus driver, to your local vegetable vendor, to the guy who opens the door for you and to the guy who serves your coffee. A simple smile, a kind gesture or a heartfelt thank you would make the day for many and we have nothing to lose but gain a lot when we do that. Not many are blessed like you and me and have to face tough situations all through their day!

Teach yourself to be a kinder human being, your children to grow up as individuals who are kind and be an example to others by being nice. What about yourself? Be kind to yourself too. When you miss a deadline, fail to match up to your high set pedestal or performance, it is okay to fail once in a while, just forgive yourself and move on to try again. 

Inculcate a culture of being kind, nice and pleasant and your day will change. We all need a bit of kindness everyday. Don't we?

#PositivePsychologist

#ConsumerPsyche
#AtoZChallenge

J for Just do it!

Just do it! 

I have seen many people and myself sometimes stay at one point where we are waiting for the best idea to emerge, best design to come up while we sit there and wait till the last minute and then rush into doing things that we are not proud of. You know what I mean don't you?

Most of the work is tiresome and non interesting but we got to get through that to get to the interesting stuff. So it is better to start off early and finish the mundane tasks that make our routine and then have time for the creative, productive stuff.

Plan your day and make good use of the plan. Have complete attention in the time you can. Like have on hour of your best time, morning coffee time in my case, to answer your mails and set out the tasks for the day. In that one hour, don't have anything open on your laptop, have your phone on emergency calls only and focus on completing the task. I also would encourage you to pick up the toughest task you have for the day and handle it as the first thing you would do for today. Answering that query, completing the presentation, replying to the client or making that report. Whatever you usually put off till the last minute, handle that first. Once you do that, you take taken up the strongest enemy on the table and then you are practically blazing through the rest of the day.

Having a coffee break or a simple stroll during the day also helps. Try it for a week and see how easy your day becomes. So don't keep it pending till the n'th hour. Just do it and finish it off.

#AtoZChallenge
#ConsumerPsyche
#PositivePsychologist

I is for Ignore Haters - Monday Blues

I have written about it before and here is the topic again. Ignoring is an art and leaving without getting hurt is another. While we live in a beautiful world, it is also important that we understand how it works to maintain the balance. For every negative thing that happens here there are many more positive that happen too. For every negative person you encounter, who want to put you down, berate you and demotivate you, we also will find more positive and encouraging people who would help us stay alive.

So when you find hates, remember haters gonna hate anyways. So why bother. If you do not have enough enemies already and people who make it a point to tell you how bad you can be, then you seems to be doing things in conformity and probably mediocre way. Stop right now. Up the ante and beat the Monday blues away!

You got to take a stance and say you are not going to compromise or hide based on what others might think. Stay strong and firm on your decision to improve. You know how you can get ahead of these haters? By being successful in what you are doing, by zipping ahead of what you set yourself up to. Stay positive, focused and remember you can burn these people by winning. 

Interestingly enough the most successful people have surged through a load of negativity to win and oddly enough it seemed to motivate them to succeed all the more. Can we use this negative fuel and perform better? After all we are human machines running for cheers. Let us convert these boos to cheers and then stunning silence when we succeed.

#AtoZChallenge
#ConsumerPsyche
#MondayBlues
#PositivePsychologist

H is for How happy you are!

Happiness is relative. Happiness is what you need to measure according to yourself. Happiness is not determined by what we have what we don't or what we can do and what we cannot. Happiness should never depend on an external factor. While it is very easy to give gyan, this is a realistic statement. Happiness is a state of the mind and is what matters most to you. 

We all experience moments of happiness all through like a win in a match, scoring good marks in an exam, going on a vacation, eating what we like but these are just fleeting moments that we encounter everyday. What determines how happy you are is a combination of all these things and few more important characteristics. 

Have you ever tried being thankful for what you have? Try being kind. Giveaway something you love to someone who needs it more thank you. Connect to someone who had wronged you and forgive them for no reason. Be normal and get the friend back. Help someone in need without expecting anything in return. You know where I am going with this.

Whenever I go to have breakfast outside I see lot of people waiting for people to give alms as they walk out. Some of them might be actors who don't need money at all but most of them are people who are genuinely hungry. I always used to buy them food but not I see lot of people doing that too! I am very happy that this trend is catching on. You won't mind leaving a 10%+ tip in your hotel bill but hesitate to give some 20 rupees to this guy to have breakfast. When you share your meal, isn't it sharing happiness? I came across this wonderful post about being grateful and thankful. 

While you should never let an external event change how you feel, always have control on creating happiness for yourself and people around you and then no one would question how happy you are! Because if there is one thing money cannot buy, that is happiness. 

#AtoZChallenge
#ConsumerPsyche
#PositivePsychologist

G for Grab those opportunities

Everyone knows that they have to grab those opportunities. What is different in this post? Well how do you recognize the opportunities. Some of them are quite visible and are easily caught while some of them disguise themselves in the form of pain, rejection, challenges, failures and hesitation. Whoever said opportunity is going to be easy was just kidding. It is going to be a monumental task to seek, make them work out in your favor and to conquer them. 

Most of the times we are held back by doubt, fear and thoughts about failure. May be we will fail or lose but the important fact is that we keep on trying. Make an effort, take a step and make it count. Put your full willpower, brain and strategy behind it. Seek help and advise, listen to everyone but follow your heart. 

Do you know what is different between leaders and followers? Leaders take a new step into an un-ventured territory without hesitation and make a way out. Leaders and winners are not exceptional people but normal please who grabbed that opportunity to excel and grow, to surge ahead of the bunch and take life in a more exciting way. Whenever you have a chance do that. Always remember that every failure is just another opportunity to take a detour. Your destination has not changed, the route might have changed. At every detour, take a deep breath and move on, forward. Grab that chance to accelerate your career, relationship and life. Cheers!

#AtoZChallenge
#ConsumerPsyche
#PositivePsychologist

F for Friends

My five year old nephew speaks to me about his huge friends circle and how they are bonding over football, jokes, technology and stuff. Every time I meet him he tells me about a new friend and how big his network is. Anyone he talks to for a few minutes becomes he friend. As children we tend to be more receptive and more willing to accept as things are. But as we grow up, we change the rules and apply these filters which ruin everything for us in relationships. 

Today I want to encourage you to explore, expand and increase your circle of friends. Don't expect but explore. As you tend to be more neutral and more receptive, you would find more peace and joy in your relationships. 

Having a circle of friends who can be your support system is excellent and helps a lot in your life. While positive friends bring you more hope, passion and encouragement, slightly harsher friends bring you more realistic view of life and so both are needed. 

Build a support system so strong that it can hold you up when you need it. Also be a part of the support system for your friends so they can trust you, believe in your capabilities and seek help. Build on your strengths that others can rely. Work on your weaknesses so you can rely on yourself too. The biggest help you can get is self help. 

Family is usually the first circle of friends we have and stay that way till the end. So don't ignore the family and be there. Make friends with people, situations and things you would have never imagined. Stop being finicky and bother about their personal preferences like food, color, taste and things like that as it wouldn't matter anyways. Focus on what is positive and improve on that. Ignore the negative. Life is too short to live in a shell and worry about all that is negative. Move forward, move ahead and be at peace.

#AtoZChallenge
#ConsumerPsyche
#TalktoTiger
#positivePsychologist

E for Everybody

Let me state it at the outset. You cannot please everybody... period. Now having out that out, let me explain. 

We all have influencers, idols, bosses, friends, partners and colleagues we continue to live with, look up to and plan to help them, work with them or have a partnership with them. But you never know when you are going to be dissed at. While trying to please everyone you might actually lose being yourself. Am I not right in saying so? If you are lucky enough to find a partner who would be willing to go that extra step to make you comfortable and you are really comfortable then the matter is different. But if you are not, then it is time to stop struggling and killing yourself over how to please that particular person. 

I am coming to you from a painful standpoint. I have just read about a suicide of a celebrity in India and have also read a couple of news items on my timeline about someone in my friend's circle who attempted suicide. Most of the these cases I have heard are based on what happened in that person's life. All they needed to do is get help!

Now suicide can be a tougher and stronger step of extreme measure but there are many among us who kill ourselves a tiny bit everyday trying to live up to someone else's expectations and it is really annoying that we continue to do so even after the other person giving two bits about it. So today's self help tip is that we accept this fact and move on. You were not brought to this beautiful world to live for somebody or their dream. Make a life of your own and live it to the fullest potential.

This is also the time for exams and if you are a student appearing in one, chill. These marks don't define who you are and you needn't be bothered about those three hours you spend in tension writing down some nonsense on your paper and feel as if they are your Mensa scores. Relax. If you are a parent, you need to relax too. We need to take this message out there and spread it.

So now that you have accepted that you can't please everyone, let us see what is important for us to excel in and move forward in that direction. Have a great day!

#AtoZChallenge

#ConsumerPsyche
#positivePsychologist

D for Dressing up @ Bangalore Fashion Week

Models getting prepped up before walking the ramp for Bangalore Fashion Week. Backdoor access is not for everyone and I got to see some exclusive candid shots.

It is a tough world when you have to get dressed up and walk out in under 180 secs and a thousand cameras, eyes, lights, high resolution super zoom cameras are aimed at you and even a small smirk, blemish is blown up and seen in a magnifying glass. There was noise, there was chaos, shouting, calling, dusting, foundation, changing, smiling, chattering, texting, eating, drinking, napping and snapping yet there was some sense of peace when professionals went about doing their jobs in calm fluid like motion where they were delivering with excellence and perfection and while the model walked out to the ramp in full glowing bulb lit six feet wide ramp and enjoyed the glory of 30 seconds the team just moved on to another model, washing, wiping, removing, adding, prepping and continued the rhythm. It shouldn't stop, it shouldn't pause; you cannot rest, you cannot fail as the show... must go on. There is so much pressure, so much tension but there is professionalism, so much positive psyche in the room as well.

Life is actually so fast and things happen so fast. If you are not ready to keep up, it will crush you, demolish you and discard you like a banana peel under a truck tire. So there should be enough practice, enough momentum and learn to adapt as quickly as possible. 

Let me connect you from the world of fashion to the workplace, train yourself in your field and keep learning even after you have been at work for a few years. Learn to be ahead of your game. Whenever there is a recession, downsizing guess who will stay and who will go! There is no excuse for being lazy or recluse. Learn the skills of the game. In today's momentary blink and miss it world, every second counts.

Also be a great team player. You need to learn to work with others, be helpful and be nice and charming in your work. Dress up to the occasion and you never know how things can turn out to be. A prepared, dressed up, planned model is more classy and relaxed. Time to get ready. So dress up!

#AtoZChallenge
#ConsumerPsyche
#DressingUp
#PositivePsychologist